So everyone’s first impression as they drive out of the airport in their beat-up Mercedes taxi with the furry toy dangling from the rear-view mirror, the broken door handles and the cracks in the windscreen, is the craziness of the driving! And yes – I couldn’t possibly disagree! But I would suggest that what make Marakshi roads uniquely mental are the mopeds. There are literally a gazillion mopeds in this city and none of them are driven in a sane fashion!

One would expect that after a certain amount of time living here, you would get used to the Moroccan psyche, and their unique and ingenious way of thinking. But I think if I live until I am a hundred their innovation and resourcefulness will never cease to amaze me! I sat down the other day to try and put together a list of the things that I have seen driving on / hanging off / balanced around a single moped that have made me say yet again – “I don’t belieeeeve it!”

8 You Can’t Do That on a Moto Moments

So here are my 8 best moments. I didn’t always have a camera with me to take it in, but I tried to supply pictures for the ones that I did.

1. A family of 5! Yes 5! Mum, Dad, and 3 kids! Dad sits on the seat, mum sits on the parcel rack behind the seat. The child just about old enough to stand is propped in front of dad standing up holding onto the handle bars (occasionally steering when dad decides to text his friend in the midst of heavy traffic!). The oldest child balances precariously on the back – depending on how large mum’s backside is will determine how precarious this manoeuvre is! Then the new-born will be sandwiched in between mum and dad. Its a wonder that they haven’t worked out where to put granny. Or maybe I just haven’t come across that one yet…….

2. A moped giving a lift to a pedal bike double-breasted on a busy road. Well – maybe his friend had had a long day and it is only nice to share the motor…….

3. A bike giving a lift to his friend on roller blades! Well – maybe he was tired too…….

4. Raw Egg Transportation: Trays of probably somewhere in the region of 500 raw eggs tied with a shoe-lace to the back parcel-rack! I even struggle getting a dozen eggs home from the supermarket in my car in one piece……..

5. A 3m X 2m pane of pane of glass. I guess it doubled-up as a windscreen……..

6. A full-sized satellite dish. You never know when you are going to miss an episode of your favourite quality Egyptian soap opera………

7. 2 X 20m long reinforced steel rods being dragged along behind! They were snaking all over the road, sparking as they dragged on the concrete……

8. Umbrellas. This one in particular makes me really giggle. Rain here is a blessing on the extremely dry land, but Moroccans don’t like to get wet. Getting your hair wet brings on ‘the baird’ (the cold), and there is nothing worse than ‘being hit by the baird!’ If you are driving by yourself then you hold the umbrella over you with your right hand and steer with your left. Or if you are lucky enough to have your family on your moped with you then the child balancing on the back can hold the umbrella over the whole family!

And all that isn’t even to mention the suitcases that get balanced precariously on the handle-bars, the unbelievably huge baskets balanced on the back filled with dear-knows what, and the ridiculous tin caps that at best get balanced on the top of your head, or at worst get balanced over the handle-bars.
I would put a challenge out to any visitor to Marrakech to see if they can spot and bring home photographic evidence of the most random thing they find being transported on one moped – I bet you’ll have fun!!!!